this is a letter i'm sending to johnny depp. because i want to. {please note: if anyone steals the text in this post i will personally get myself a pair of scissorhands and hunt you down. i don't mean to scare anyone, but stealing isn't cool, you guys. especially when it comes to johnny depp.}
dear johnny,
first, let me say i'm a huge fan. i'm not going to say that's cliche even though it is, but it's true. second, i wish i could've sent you a cupcake. but i think it would've decomposed before you got it, and that's not cool at all.
third, i think we're related somewhere in the whole universal-scale-of-things. i am first and foremost an African-American and second Cherokee Indian. which means we're most likely cousins from some ancestor or another.
fourth, and probably not my last point, i wanted to write you this letter, because i thought you'd be a person who understood. a lot of people don't understand me, and i know a lot of people don't understand you either. so see? we're practically best friends. we'd be better friends if i could send you that cupcake, though. also, i'm chatting with my friend as i write this, and she says cupcakes solve everything. her name is madalyn and she thinks you have a very nice accent.
back to subject: i have these friends. well, more like acquaintances, i guess. i've known them for so long, and they've become who they've become, when i've stayed the same. they like justin bieber and i like narnia. and they think i'm a psychopath for it. they like rap and i like john williams's "cadillac of the skies" from empire of the sun. {you should totally listen to that by the way, it's beast.} and when i am who i am and say what i feel they look at me like my skull is on the outside and my skin is on the inside. they say i'm not funny, and i do the dumbest things, and i just waved it off, thinking they had no imagination.
my mom asked me something a few weeks ago. she asked me how many real friends i had. and how many have stuck with me through thick and thin. i may have only come up with two or three. because all the others are great, but we haven't gone through hard times and actually made it through. we're still friends, but we don't really...know each other. you know?
i'm not one of those people who thinks about committing suicide everyday. i know i'm better than that. but i still hurt sometimes. another reason they do this is because i'm homeschooled. ever known a black girl from a well-to-do neighborhood in a well known town in texas who's homeschooled and loves narnia? well, now you do.
i was at the austin film festival last week for the special screening of edward scissorhands. you were there. you wore the skull ring, the dark blue vest with two pocket watches, you had your 3D-like glasses on, and a hanky showing out your back jeans pocket. you waved at me. or, at least in my direction. a 30yr old woman behind me freaked out. i told her to calm down because 2012 was next year. i don't actually believe in 2012 though. all for the sake of good comebacks.
a lot of my friends think you're a freak. they think i'm a freak, too. so i guess you could say we have a lot in common. but the thing is with me: i refuse to be bullied. people can judge, but i won't let them get to me. and you don't have to come to my town and give my "friends" a piece of your mind. there's an old saying...i think it's by Dr. Suess. "be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." i matter. and i don't mind who you are. i love who you are. on that note, i think your fingernails are awesome! where'd you get that polish?
so, the last thing i have to say is: fifth, my name is jocelyn. i'm fourteen years old {<< fifteen now}, and i when i grow up i want to be a film composer and a writer. i am who i am and i say what i feel and my friends don't have to care, but i know you care. also, i really wish i could've sent you that cupcake.
{pee ess: i loved you in edward scissorhands. i wrote a poem for you, it's on my blog "cupcake dictionary". google it.}
source
for good measure? yeah i think they're pretty, too.
-kiss kiss kiss, hug dreadlocks- << because jackie makes them look good.
{pee ess: I KNOW A SECRET I KNOW A SECRET. But you guys won't know until Christmas, so...BE EXCITED.}
