4.09.2013

greater.

You can’t run out of ideas. If you run out of ideas it means you’ve stopped using your brain, and if you’ve stopped using your brain it means you don’t know what you’re living for, and if you don’t know what you’re living for it means you’re dead. - abby moreland
some thoughts that have been like manacles in my head lately:
+ infatuation is not an excuse to say you love someone, it comes and goes like select-season foods. it's either there, raging with life and presentation, or it's not. and you can't make yourself feel something that you know is fading away. friendship is more important, God is love. don't force your hand into something you know isn't there.
+ your photos are not as good as hannah's, so what's the point in sharing them? who are you if you are not the best?
+ she writes unconventionally, without bounds or restrain. you are too uptight, you are too predictable. this is a bad novel idea. don't write it, it's stupid. no one's going to publish it, no one's going to read it. so what are you doing?
+ maybe you should give up on this blog altogether.
+ you already won the music contest two years in a row. they may not like this next piece. so what makes you think you'll win a second time?
+ ugly ugly ugly.
+ you don't read the Bible enough and you never hear God talking to you and you fail and everything and you suck and it's all your fault, everything is all your fault, you've come too far to turn make and make up for it, you can't do anything right and you will never be forgiven.

scriptures that override these thoughts:
+ philippians 4:13 - i can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
+ romans 5:3-5 - we can rejoice when we run into problems and trials, for we know they develop endurance, which develops strength in character, which strengthens our confident hope of salvation. and this hope will not lead to disappointment, for God loves us dearly.
+ matthew 11:28 - come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and i will give you rest.
+ jeremiah 29:11 - for i know the plans i have for you, plans to help you, not to harm you; plans to give you hope and a future.
+ psalm 119:105 - your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.
+ john 3:16 - for God so loved jocelyn that He gave His only begotten Son so that if she believes in Him she will not perish, but have everlasting life.

i put my name in the last verse because God is talking about me. because He is talking about you. because He is talking about all of us and we apply to everything He's said. no matter what happens in my life, no matter what i feel, my God is greater. my God is greater than my lack of blogging ideas, my God is greater than the way i see myself, my God is greater than what is trying to keep me from moving on. and i think i need to focus more on the fact that my God is greater, so you won't be seeing as much of me in the next few weeks. as i get busier and busier with my schooling and my life in general, i need to put more effort into spending time in the Word and becoming stronger in Him. so i'm not disappearing altogether, in fact, i'll also be working on some exciting {!!!} things to come, so stay tuned, stay tapped in, eat a cupcake and belt out les mis. just believe that things are good for me, and if they're not, they will be soon. 

and i will believe the same about you.
love always,
jocee.
{pea ess: last bit courtesy of perks.}
{pea pea ess: i'm not going to quit blogging, i mean BAHAHAHA that's cray. love you guys.}

25 comments :

  1. I'm actually really happy that you quoted Abby. It's a quotation worth quoting. :-)
    We always seem to invent the most outrageous lies, and then believe them wholeheartedly! But yet, we really need to believe God's word, because it is unadulterated truth.

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  2. Leave Hannah out of this!! you compliment fisher you. Seriously, why make her feel bad? she has more experience and a MARK ii, stop comparing yourself.

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    1. i'm not trying to 'fish for compliments' and i'm not trying to make her feel bad. i'm just trying to be as truthful as i can. comparison is the thief of all joy, and while we all try to be above it, it's something that kind of sneaks in and pulls us down if we let it. and i've let it pull me down. so i'm not trying to call her out, it's just a thought that's been plaguing me.

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    2. i think it's natural for us to compare ourselves. we always do... in everything. Hannah is a talented, beautiful, amazing young lady, but just because we aren't as talented in those areas doesn't mean we aren't just as special, talented and beautiful in different ways. :) everyone deserves respect, love and appreciation. Jocee understands that... and appreciating yourself is much harder than appreciating others' gifts and talents. :)

      -another anonymous<3

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    3. ^^ what this anon said. :) <3

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  3. been feeling kinda the same way lately with random things that don't really make sense, but prayer, friends and reading blogs like this let me know i'm not alone. <3
    xx.
    sophie

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  4. Maybe I would like to break down and cry after reading this very arrow-to-the-heart post. Because that's what it is. You've just revealed the thoughts going through my brain as well, but thank you. This is just the reminder I needed. And girl, you are beautiful, you are wonderful, and best of all, you are Loved. Oh, and those things to come sound really good.

    xo, Jemimah

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  5. YOU AND ABBY ARE FULL OF WISDOM + everyone's photographs are meaningful.. they tell a personal story, remember that! xox

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  6. Jocee. this post literally brought tears to my eyes & it made my heart ache and thrill at the same time. i know i feel the same way at times. we all try so hard to copy others (because they are admired) that we neglect to cultivate our own beautiful gifts and talents that God gave us. thank you so much for sharing this, girl.

    i love your heart.

    much love,
    mikailah
    www.maid4him.blogspot.com

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  7. Mm. Thisis so good, Joc. (You know I've been having some of those thoughts myself lately.) Love you for being so bold and real and genuine.

    xo | jess

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  8. I wish I could just give you a big hug. Thank you so much for your honesty, Jocee. I mean do you know how many times my jaw has dropped at some of the things YOU have written? The photos you take? Your art is so beautiful and unique.

    <3 You're awesome.

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  9. Be you, Jocee. Be real - completely real, not a "real" you make up and use to hide behind. Don't compare yourself to others because we all have our (really bad) faults, we just aren't talking about them. Don't try to become like the popular bloggers (I think we've all tried...it doesn't work). Invest yourself in what matters most to YOU, not what blogs are telling you is important. I LOVE you the most when you are speaking your heart, saying what you feel and think, not caring what other people will think, not wanting to be like other people. Because when you are you, it's beautiful and genuine, and that's the way we all should be...seriously, every time you do that, it inspires me to be more me...even in daily life! You encourage me so much, Jocee! :)

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    Replies
    1. no i did not cry while reading this.
      yes i am lying.

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  10. Oooohh Jocee. this is the best. thank you for summing up some of my own thoughts.

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  11. ps: don't don't DON'T stop blogging!!

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  12. this post made me cry.
    like, real, genuine tears that haven't been shed in a long while, and it made my heart ache in such a way that only God could make beautiful.
    everything you wrote, it all applies to my current place in life. this post, your words, they struck a cord in my heart, and for that i am thankful. you are a lovely person, jocee, inside and out. i know many a blogger has told you that in a comment or an email, but i mean it. you challenge this thing called blogging. you challenge the word "real." you inspire me to create and to love deeply and live boldly and you've inspired me to move on with life, and deal with things as they come. you are strong and lovely, bold and raw. thank you so much for being willing to share your heart, your struggles, your life with us. it means the world to me. and i know i don't comment all the time (because i'm the weird creeper that i am), but every post, whether it's just all photos or all words or whatever, everything you do, it all inspires me to become a better person, and inspires me to work harder towards being real and raw, online and off.
    thank you, dear. thankyouthankyouthankyou.
    xoxo.

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  13. love how honest and real you are.
    <3

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  14. Eat cupcakes and belt out les mis... :) Love you, sweet girl!

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  15. I love that quote of Abby's! And I'm glad you're taking a break, it'll definitely help...reading the Bible always does :)
    I'll miss you and I won't forget to belt out Les Mis either!
    xo

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  16. This is such a great reminder. Thank you, Jocee! :) And I've always loved that Abby quote. <3

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  17. This post is really good. :) (Sorry it's been a little while since I've been here last.)

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  18. thank you to the infinity for this, jocee. i love you so much. also, i know what you mean about hannah. i mean, she's totally amazing, but i've totally fallen into the trap of comparison with her, and i know she doesn't intend that, at all, but it just happens because of how INCREDIBLE she is. anyways, rambling over. but i really love you and i don't want you to ever stop sharing, ever. okay? hugs. <3

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  19. your honesty is beautiful.
    your belief in God to overcome the lies is astounding.

    guess what?
    you are posting photos.
    you are writing.
    you are blogging.
    you are playing music.
    you are beautiful.
    you are forgiven.

    keep doing what you are doing.
    because you are doing your best.
    and that is all anyone can ask for.

    don't forget.
    YOU ARE HIS.
    His precious daughter whom he loves more than ANYTHING.
    find your confidence in Him.

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  20. One of my favorite blogposts that I have ever read on any blog. I know how you feel, so it's beautiful to see it reflected back to me from your own soul. Love love love all you wrote. (: xo

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  21. Did you SERIOUSLY just quote ME on YOUR blog.
    #dead

    But... this post. Ah, this post. It's so dear to my heart because I relate to this so very much. The comparing, the thinking I'm ugly, the feeling like I should stop blogging, the wondering what's the point in my writing, the self-doubts, which are really doubts in God, because I can't do anything by my own self.
    And then here you come combating the lies with scripture, reminding me how terrible these lies are.
    Bless you, dear friend.

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sometimes i do not understand why you guys like me so much, but the fact that you do (and that you keep coming around) makes me happier than you can even imagine.

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