7.19.2013

the cycle of missing you.

my thoughts are the past.Untitled
so, it's not raining outside but it is dark and thunder is rolling and i miss you.
and people talk about missing someone as if it's an emotion or maybe even temporary.
but for me, it's a perpetual thing that marinates in my subconscious thought and only really makes itself evident to my consciousness in passing.
i look at pizza (silly as it sounds) and i remember the time where you thought i was mad at you but i was looking out for you and i miss you.
i smell laundry detergent and i think of washateria and mallory's wavy hair (like taylor swift only better) and your moustache hoodie and i miss you.
and missing you is more than a memory (and scars have memory), it's knowing that i feel like myself when i'm around you and when i am away, i feel like i am the shadow of a human being, afraid of the sun because it's not raining outside, it is the shadow of a rainfall, and dear God, i miss you.




it's raining.
i think the sky is crying for me.
one day more, baby.
love, 
jo.

{the last letter to my best friend while i'm away that signifies how much she means to me, with one day more to wait until the eight affirmations become a tangible medium.}

17 comments :

  1. This is one song that's honestly, literally bringing tears to my eyes. Darling, this is beautiful. Too beautiful to catch and wound into more words. You've already sung and played it all.
    It's funny how words and notes tickle one's emotions -- but that's exactly what this has done to me. (Perhaps because I was just thinking about oceans, shores, and friends lately.)
    You've got a bright future out there, Jocee. And it must be wonderful to have you as a friend.
    Once again, this is a too-beautiful-for-more-words last letter finale. Still, I can't help saying 'encore'!

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  2. wow. the song, just the mere lyrics, plus your totally beautiful voice and piano playing--just makes me have this really sincere feeling coming from you.

    Love this post so much. like, so much.

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  3. Just so beautiful and real. Your voice and your playing - it's just...perfect. And now I feel like crying or something.
    Beautiful. You've got such a beautiful gift.
    xoxox
    sw
    http://afreemindsw.blogspot.com/

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  4. You have very nice musical skills
    ;)

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  5. OH my gosh, you made this?! Most impressed! Hats off to Jocee, everyone!

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  6. OH EM GEE. LIKE. LIKE. YOU ROCK. AND YOU ARE GORGEOUS. AND LIKE. LIKE. I LIKE THIS A LOT.

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  7. this song made me cry. beautiful words and singing, Jocee. <3

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  8. CAN I PLEASE BUY THAT SONG AND LISTEN TO IT FOR LIKE, EVER.

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  9. your voice... the song... the lyrics... it's all so perfect.

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  10. so yeah. I might be crying a little bit right now *cough cough*. It makes me think about my old best friend.

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sometimes i do not understand why you guys like me so much, but the fact that you do (and that you keep coming around) makes me happier than you can even imagine.

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