8.26.2015

i am not as fine as i seem, pardon.


“Hi Jocee. I just want to get this out of me. My friends hate me randomly - middle school is full of drama and one of my close friends just flat out called me a bully. For no reason and she won't explain. I hope she's kidding. I'm just so stressed and neck deep in worries and I don't know what to do. Ohmygosh.”

It: You have reached the psychology bank. How can I help you?
You: Open the personality log...
It: Personality log open. What do you want to know?
You: Define the personalities.
It: Defining personalities: 
  • Choleric: Extroverted, short-tempered, active, controlling, resourceful. The main motivation of cholerics are to win. They want to get things done their way, which is the right way. A weakness includes making snap judgments about others and failing to empathize with others' personal feelings –
You: Next.
It:
  • Sanguine: Extroverted, outgoing, fun-loving, positive, persuasive. The main motivation of sanguines are to have fun. They want to get things done the exciting way. Two weaknesses include messiness and a short attention span –
You: Next.
It:
  • Phlegmatic: Introverted, easy-going –
You: Next.
It:
  • Melancholy: Introverted, analytical, emphatic often private, practical. The main motivation of melancholies are to avoid conflict. They want to get things done the right way. They are often afraid of being wrong. They are sometimes driven by others' perceptions of them. Some weaknesses include cynicism, overthinking, the fear of being alone, the fear of being alone, the fear of being alone, the fear of being alone—paralyzing fear lying awake at night and thinking Oh God Oh God Oh God they hate me, this is it, it's over, it's all my fault, what have I done wrong I have done everything wrong, I won't be able to recover from this..
You: Next –
It: No one loves me I have no friends I can't breathe
You: Next Next Next!!!
It: Scared of my own image, scared of my own immaturity scared I'll die of uncertainty, fear might be the death of me, fear leads to anxiety, don't know what's inside of me, don't –
You: STOP. Shut down. Be quiet. No more.

sometimes to stay alive you gotta kill your mind. but HEY. it's going to be okay. 
it's going to be okay and i love you and if they don't value you as a friend or a person it's time to leave them behind. 
middle school is actually one of the most important periods of a person's life.
and i don't want it to leave you broken
-kiss kiss kiss, skeleton clique-
{pea ess: so. uh. all the twenty one pilots references, aye?}

4 comments :

  1. TWENTY ONE PILOTS.

    Also, I haven't talked to you in forever!! Aw, I miss you!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ah I love this post. I used to think people never had real severe flaws in real life, that it wasn't possible for someone to be irritating or controlling because no one is that bad; but sadly people disappoint. Friends aren't what you expected and they will betray you like you never thought someone could or would, people will judge and judge and make others feel less than equal. And for all those 'melancholy' people out there, these unexpected acts of malice will consume them. I guess the world is made for the strong - not strong as in 'winners' but strong as in withstanders. If you're able to love yourself, no one can bring you down. Some people are disappointing, that's all.

    -M
    The Life of Little Me

    ReplyDelete
  3. OH MY GOD YOU DID MINE. Thank you :))

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. of course!! you are valuable and loved, darling. <3

      Delete

sometimes i do not understand why you guys like me so much, but the fact that you do (and that you keep coming around) makes me happier than you can even imagine.

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