12.20.2011

you have perspective

this is a letter i'm sending to johnny depp. because i want to. {please note: if anyone steals the text in this post i will personally get myself a pair of scissorhands and hunt you down. i don't mean to scare anyone, but stealing isn't cool, you guys. especially when it comes to johnny depp.}

dear johnny, 
first, let me say i'm a huge fan. i'm not going to say that's cliche even though it is, but it's true. second, i wish i could've sent you a cupcake. but i think it would've decomposed before you got it, and that's not cool at all. 

third, i think we're related somewhere in the whole universal-scale-of-things. i am first and foremost an African-American and second Cherokee Indian. which means we're most likely cousins from some ancestor or another. 

fourth, and probably not my last point, i wanted to write you this letter, because i thought you'd be a person who understood. a lot of people don't understand me, and i know a lot of people don't understand you either. so see? we're practically best friends. we'd be better friends if i could send you that cupcake, though. also, i'm chatting with my friend as i write this, and she says cupcakes solve everything. her name is madalyn and she thinks you have a very nice accent. 

back to subject: i have these friends. well, more like acquaintances, i guess. i've known them for so long, and they've become who they've become, when i've stayed the same. they like justin bieber and i like narnia. and they think i'm a psychopath for it. they like rap and i like john williams's "cadillac of the skies" from empire of the sun. {you should totally listen to that by the way, it's beast.} and when i am who i am and say what i feel they look at me like my skull is on the outside and my skin is on the inside. they say i'm not funny, and i do the dumbest things, and i just waved it off, thinking they had no imagination. 

my mom asked me something a few weeks ago. she asked me how many real friends i had. and how many have stuck with me through thick and thin. i may have only come up with two or three. because all the others are great, but we haven't gone through hard times and actually made it through. we're still friends, but we don't really...know each other. you know?

i'm not one of those people who thinks about committing suicide everyday. i know i'm better than that. but i still hurt sometimes. another reason they do this is because i'm homeschooled. ever known a black girl from a well-to-do neighborhood in a well known town in texas who's homeschooled and loves narnia? well, now you do.

i was at the austin film festival last week for the special screening of edward scissorhands. you were there. you wore the skull ring, the dark blue vest with two pocket watches, you had your 3D-like glasses on, and a hanky showing out your back jeans pocket. you waved at me. or, at least in my direction. a 30yr old woman behind me freaked out. i told her to calm down because 2012 was next year. i don't actually believe in 2012 though. all for the sake of good comebacks. 

a lot of my friends think you're a freak. they think i'm a freak, too. so i guess you could say we have a lot in common. but the thing is with me: i refuse to be bullied. people can judge, but i won't let them get to me. and you don't have to come to my town and give my "friends" a piece of your mind. there's an old saying...i think it's by Dr. Suess. "be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." i matter. and i don't mind who you are. i love who you are. on that note, i think your fingernails are awesome! where'd you get that polish?

so, the last thing i have to say is: fifth, my name is jocelyn. i'm fourteen years old {<< fifteen now}, and i when i grow up i want to be a film composer and a writer. i am who i am and i say what i feel and my friends don't have to care, but i know you care. also, i really wish i could've sent you that cupcake.

{pee ess: i loved you in edward scissorhands. i wrote a poem for you, it's on my blog "cupcake dictionary". google it.}
Pinned Image
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for good measure? yeah i think they're pretty, too.
-kiss kiss kiss, hug dreadlocks- << because jackie makes them look good.
{pee ess: I KNOW A SECRET I KNOW A SECRET. But you guys won't know until Christmas, so...BE EXCITED.}

19 comments :

  1. Jocee, this is just beaut-ee-ful. Wow! Did you really see him at the film festival? I would have died and gone to heaven, like, three times over.
    I feel ya, chica. I'm a missionary kid who lives in Korea & the Philippines... people definitely don't understand that. :) we can be misunderstood buddies... haha. merry christmas girl. ps. I love your writing... its reminds me alot of Sharon Creech! (<-- my favorite)

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  2. first, I LOVED this letter!
    second, You made me like johnny Depp!
    third, That's one of my favorite quotes!
    fourth, The cupcake probably WOULD decompose
    and fifth, This was an awesome post and I hope you keep doing one's like these!

    xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo (hehe I'm full of love)
    ~dezzy

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  3. you make my heart sigh in content. really, you do.

    side note: you said: "so, the last thing i have to say is: fifth, my name is jocelyn. i'm fourteen years old" [girlie, you're fiffteeen!]

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  4. Oh Jocee, I LOVED this post. You are just so amazing. I am sure Johnny Depp will love it.

    I also know where you are coming from with your friendships that went wrong. I have been looked askance all my life because I like classical music and I like reading. I only have a couple people that I could say are real friends. Its tough, but having just those few friends makes them a whole lot more special doesn't it?

    xoxo,
    --Abi

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  5. Hey Joce,
    Firstly, I don't think you're weird at all. I loooove narnia too, and I am not a fan of justin bieber.

    And honestly, (although this is rather awkward to say) I want to be your friend. That sounds totally stalkish, but hear me out. You have great things to say on here. You're a really reallly good writer. You're so unique. You're you and you din't try to be anyone else.

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  6. Hahah, this made me smile. it's like, you spilling your heart to Johnny Depp. Just what I would do if I ever met Van Gogh. Very touching ;)

    and also, you can send ME that cupcake, if you like, and I can then send Johnny a letter telling him how fabulous it was. Pinky Promise! XD

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  7. OH HAHA! I just realized you did say you were 14! but your 15! xD

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  8. Thats great!! Did you actually send it? I hope so, I'm sure that letter would brighten anyone's day!;) you should write a letter to William too. Seriously:) your letters are to die for!

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  9. Everything about this letter is amazing. I understand what it's like to be so different from others, as well as having only a few really close friends.

    Oh, and your Edward Scissorhands poem is perfect. Don't ever change, Jocee.

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  10. a.... I love it!
    b.... Most people think I'm weird too.
    c.... I love Dr. Seuss!
    d.... You've inspired me to send that letter I've always wanted to send to Pixar Animation Studios (Toy Story 1,2,3, Finding Nemo, Monsters, Inc.... :)

    love,

    abbie-xoxo

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  11. I absolutely love this, Jocee!
    It made me smile. :)
    And homeschoolers who love Narnia? My favorite type of people. :)

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  12. I love how I'm in the letter because I said he has a cool accent(:
    I'm so happy you finally posted it though! It's seriously one of the greatest things of all time.

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  13. i'm commenting on this post again because i like it that much.
    xx

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  14. loved this! that's my favorite quote ever. umm so if he reads this, HI from mary ann! :) haha.
    also, I'm really excited to find out about the secret.

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  15. I love this! You are a great writer, Jocelyn. I heard your voice in the letter and how important you think it is for you to be yourself. For everyone. Being nothing but who you are meant to be. Everyone should have a frame of mind like that.

    By the way......
    NARNIA ROCKS! (And so do homeschoolers!)

    Peace, Love and Happiness :)

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  16. Oh yeah. I adore Johnny Depp as well! He's handsome....and awesome! :)

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  17. This letter is so very perfect. You MUST send it to him! :)

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  18. Oh wow- Jocee this is beautiful :) xxxxx

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sometimes i do not understand why you guys like me so much, but the fact that you do (and that you keep coming around) makes me happier than you can even imagine.

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