how a milkshake can signify growing up.

well, this still isn't a year-in-review post. but it does have something to do with the years passing by. i realised it a little after my uncle and aunt left for the last time before they flew back to california (we won't see them again until april) and a little before bedtime, as daddy poured a mason jar full of vanilla milkshake for both joy and i.

i haven't had a milkshake in years. i think the last time daddy made one was before joy was born, which was nearly 8 years ago. i don't even think she's had a (homemade) milkshake in her life.

and that, in turn, got me thinking about growing up.

right now, i'm older than i've ever been and as young as i ever will be. but at this time one year ago, i wasn't as close to some things as i am now. sooner than ever before, i'll get my driver's license. i'll take my SAT. i'll send in applications to college/move out/go to university. i'll get a job and start paying my own bills, among other things. i wasn't as close to those things a second ago as i am right now.

and yet, as my lips kissed the cold mason jar and my tongue took on the familiar taste of vanilla and milk, i was reduced to that 8 year old kid again. it was as if no time had gone by. it was as if i begged daddy to make the milkshake so i'd be able to stay up some minutes later than i usually did, just like old times.

everyone asks this: where has all the time gone? personally, i think it comes and creates memories, storing them in the most precious parts of your head and heart, and then it recycles itself to do it all over again. have you noticed that when you live in the now, nothing seems to have changed, and then when you look back, you see that everything has changed? time (funny litt'l bugga) has a way of doing that. and i sort of admire it for that.

so here i am, 16 years old, on december 31st, 2012, at 4:15:22pm. i want another milkshake. i'm about to leave for the long centre to volunteer for the blue man group with mommy before heading to the same new years eve party. i will take every moment and hold it dangerously close, like a hug so tight that one has fear of choking.

because one day, after i've drunk up the last of another milkshake, i'll look in the mirror and see (God forbid) my first wrinkle. or gray hair. or something. so i figure i should remember now in great, great detail.

or i can just become a time lord and regenerate after every milkshake. yes, i like this idea better. happy new years, sweet'ms. that december post? tomorrow. promise.
-kiss kiss kiss, little red-haired girl-


  1. Happy New Year to you too, Jocee! :)

  2. Wow, just wow. Such raw words I cannot comprehend how lovely they are..
    May 2013 bring you change in wondrous ways!
    Ttyl... I'll talk to you next year! ;)

  3. I laughed out loud at that last part. Yes. (Though I think you are secretly a timelord ;)

    But in all seriousness this was something to remember. And your writing is beautiful.

    Happy New Year girlie :)

  4. I love your words. It's kinda scary, in my opinion...I remember when I was a kid and I remembered I never wanted to grow up. But it didn't happen, did it now? When I grow old, I will be wishing that I could be younger, like when I was a kid. And then somewhere in between all that, I'll be wishing to grow up. Like right now I can't wait to be 14 even though I only met 13 for 2 months. It's strange, how the mind works.

    But seriously, your words. They just flow.

  5. <3 This is so beautiful, jocee. I am too often wishing that I can grow up faster, :) but am starting to realize that sixteen is a really lovely age.

  6. Milkshakes are awesome, though I admit that I haven't tasted one in quite awhile. Sounds good...
    Happy new year, Jocee, I think I'll go and have a milkshake! :)

  7. HAPPY NEW YEAR MAH LIL CUPCAKE-MUNCHIN TEXAN GIRL!! man alive. I love the way you write...the way you think.
    can I marry your brain? *brownie points if you can tell me where that's from* also, make a milkshake for me? thanks. 2013 is gonna be amazing, mainly coz WE'RE in it, but it's gonna be amazing anyway.

  8. Hahaha! I think you should definitely become a timelord! :) This is such a great post Jocee!
    Kimmy x

  9. oh gosh, is it weird that i am in love with your writing? this post is just amazing. happy new year, jocee! x

  10. If so, I'll become a time lord with you (The Master, perhaps?) and drink milkshakes till the year 5 billion or until I become the next Face of Boe and eventually die.

  11. Your writing is all kinds of lovely and this post is beautifully poignant.


sometimes i do not understand why you guys like me so much, but the fact that you do (and that you keep coming around) makes me happier than you can even imagine.

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